The time has

come for me to return to work. The day I have dreaded for so long... the day that I thought if I prayed hard enough would never come...the day that is like a bad dream...is not a dream anymore and is here. I am sick, I am sad, I am scared, I am aching inside, and althought I could focus on the positive and find some good in this sitution.

I can't... I physically can't...where is the postitive in that fact that we can't spend our days together and both want too...where is the positive in that fact that she is going to miss me dearly...and I am going to miss her so much it hurts every single second of every day...People tell me I will get used to it...I think that is wonderful that some people can get used to it I wish I were one of the people but I am just not...

I can't see that silver lining becuase I can't imgaine a day that I will get in my car tear free and say I am ok with this...my heart hurts badly. I have literally spend every seccond of everyday with her since last October. She is always with me... I am never alone... she is my best friend. She completes me and without her parting of me is missing.

Is all I can do is pray for strenght and hold a picture of her close to my heart while I am at work.

Another Doctor's Appointment

vaccincations, questions, answers, weight, length, cries, laughs, all great! she is just growing beautifully she shifted a bit down in weight and up in lenght. She weighs 15 pounds 10 ounces now and is 27 1/2 inches. So she is now 50% for weight and 90% for height! She is going to be tall girl! Everything went perfect and once again I thank God over and over for this miracle! This perfect healthy miracle that we love more than life itself...our miracle that we brought into this world...that loves us and depends on us...that makes our lives so complete. We feel so blessed for another great appointment! We don't have another one until she is nine months old! I can't believe I will have a nine month old in less then three months!

And at six months she is quite a social butterfly. She loves her Fridays with Lainey and Lily and this week she made a new friend Kristina.

her first sleepover...

and it was with a boy....Is it love at first sight? Here is how the story goes...

they are doing their own thing...

Alan notices Skye...

She gets excited... Alan thinks about making a move...He gests closer... Skye is done waiting and makes the first move...They kiss...Alan is proud of himself and cheers...

Alan goes back for more and Skye plays hard to get...

A typical love relationship it is not much different as adults...

Joe was out of town so Rayna and Alan come over for a sleepover. We had so much fun! We ate dinner, played with the kids, put them to bed and drank a glass ok some glasses of wine, listened to Sugarland, and talked. Our first sleepover was so fun. We can wait to do it again at the end of the month.

A Typical Day

with Skye is never short of love and laughter. We wake up, nurse, play with our toys, eat breakfast, take a walk, nurse, take a nap, nurse, run some earrands, nap, nurse, eat dinner, play some more, and then go to bed. I believe the routine and consistency help children thrive. So even though we do the same thing day in and day out it nevers gets boring or seems like we are doing the same thing because she is so fun. And everyday is so new to her so it feels new to me. I love you Skye and love that I spend everyday with you doing the samething! A typical day is not typical at all...it is new and different.

We went to Cambier park today with Kelle, Carin and all the girls! It was so fun! She loved all the girls and she loved the swing!

I weight 16 pounds now! Daddy and mommy made a bet and Daddy was right... of course he was!

Our Angel

is six months old today. It has been the most incredible six months of my life. This journey through motherhood has been much more than I had ever dreamed of. She is just amazing and everyday is better and happier because of her. She is just doing new things everyday and she amazes Joe and me. She is rolling over , sitting up, talking all the time, tyring to wave, blowing rasberries... everyday is new.

Two big challenges we are facing are the car and sleeping through the night. She just doesen't like the car she screams in the car and it is very stressful. It is partly my fault as I have spoiled her so much so when she is in the car I am not playing with her and giving her attention so she cries/screams!

The night is still hard she is waking up two times a night still and sometimes even more than that. She doesn't take a pacifer or suck her thumb so when she wakes up in the middle of the night she doesn't know how to calm herself unless I nurse her. She is so attched to nursing. I pick her up and just nurse her for few minutes then I lay her back down awake and she puts herself back to sleep after the comfort of nursing. It is crazy. So she is crying for me and because I know that letting her cry-it-out just seems cruel. But I know that is what I am going to need to do in order to break this attachment. She is very attached to me but I am also so attached to her.

So right now these are two challenges we face... but I know in time they will work themselves out with a little assistance I just want to do it right and I don't know what right is...Is there a right.I can't imagine what the next six months will bring...these first six months have been fantastic and it keeps getting better. Happy Six Months Sweetheart mommy and daddy love you more than words can express. You are not only the most beauitful girl in the world...you have the sweetest heart and you make us so happy.

Happy New Year

We had a wonderful low key New Year. Normally we get all dressed up, go downtown, eat a really expensive dinner, and fight the crowds spending entirely too much money but not this year.

We had some friends over, ate tons of yummy apps, grilled out, played games, drank lots of yummy drinks, laughed, talked, toasted champagne, and really enjoyed each others company. It was PERFECT my best New Years ever. All while Skye was sound asleep in her room.

My adorable pregnant girls. Oh how I love them and their cute baby bumps. Marsha is having a perfect healthy boy and I think my Sammy is too! Boy of Girl I can't wait to get my hands on their angels. I am so excited for them!

What a wonderful year we had! I am looking forward to 2009 can't wait to make more memories and happy times with my family and friends.

Happy New Year